Military moms are masters of worry and concern as their children are shipped off to many parts of the world. Sometimes we don’t even know exactly where they are, depending on their job.
During my soldier’s first deployment sadness and fear were overwhelming me constantly. I found myself sobbing my life away, moment by moment.
Being so preoccupied with my soldier’s journey on the other side of the world caused me to neglect other aspects of my life. I’m pretty sure family and friends were weary of hearing me speak at length about my soldier and fears.
Considering my soldier’s long military career ahead, this imbalance in my life clearly wouldn’t work long term.
Creating life balance was the key to living a happier and more fulfilling life. We hear so much about work-life balance, but life balance applies to many more situations beyond work.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed and preoccupied, you can create balance in your life. Here are some tips that worked for me and I hope they help you on your military mom journey.
Set boundaries
Being stressed and worried all the time isn’t going to help you or your child. You have the power to set boundaries and keep moving in the right direction for overall well-being.
When you set healthy boundaries, you set limits around how you spend each moment of life.
Let’s talk about setting limits around your emotional energy.
How much time are you spending on emotional energy aimed at your child? All that emotional energy is a way to cope with your child’s absence and duties. But if it causes excessive stress and imbalance for you, it’s time to take charge of your wandering mind.
You can’t eliminate your worry but you can set boundaries and prioritize other activities in life.
Related: Save the date! MSEP is holding a military spouse hiring fair in the DC-Metro area on Oct 27
Make choices
Letting go is hard and you’ll hit some rough spots. But you get to decide how you’ll move through this season of life.
I found strength in the fact that a military career was my son’s choice, part of his lifelong dream. My son’s achievements helped me to move through the military-mom tough times with grace and balance.
Wherever you find that strength, use it to help balance your life and make it easier to manage challenges. There’ll be plenty of challenges when your child joins the military. Are you ready to rise to the occasion?
You can. It’s a choice. Life balance isn’t something that just happens. It’s something you create for yourself.
Schedule time for fun, friends, and family
Spending too much time alone can be overwhelming if you’re full of worrisome thoughts. It’s important to spend time with others and have fun. It helps take your mind off your worry.
You can find joy with people that matter most to you and have a positive influence. Attend a fun lunch or other activity to open up your emotions to joyful moments.
If you’ve been moping around, that’s not even close to a good life balance. Have more fun!
Spending time with others can feed your soul in a positive way and create more life balance. It will also help you to be more motivated and energized!
Related: How do you make friends as a Milspouse?
Be present, wherever you are
I can’t count the number of times I was somewhere but wasn’t really present. I may have been with people or walking along a beautiful ocean shoreline.
Being lost in my fearful thoughts caused me to not enjoy those moments. My mind was elsewhere. That’s a recipe for life imbalance.
Think about how you can be present in the moment and enjoy life without worrisome distractions. Take notice of the things around you and be grateful. If you’re out in nature, listen to the sounds, and take in the wonderful sights.
When conversing with others, focus on that person and really listen to what they’re saying. When our minds wander, it’s like we’re not there at all.
Gather with other military moms
We shouldn’t have to face our fears alone. Let’s face it, as military moms, we have plenty of things to worry about. Finding balance doesn’t mean ignoring those fears. It means living life without excluding anything outside of your soldier.
I’ve seen military moms stop living a full life due to emotional exhaustion. Let’s turn that around!
Make time to spend with other military moms to share your feelings and know that you are not alone. Be there for each other when your mind runs away with mind-boggling thoughts.
Cherish every moment of military-mom life
Fear is part of a military mom’s journey. It takes energy to keep your fear at bay but will lead to cherishing every moment instead of dreading it.
Keep yourself balanced, strong, and happy to better support your military service member.
Feature Image: Madigan Army Medical Center pediatricians, registered nurses, lactation consultants, and military spouses and their babies gather together Aug. 2 at MAMC on Joint Base Lewis-McChord, Wash., during one of the hospital’s Moms Own Milk group sessions. (Photo by Sgt. Christopher Gaylord/5th Mobile Public Affairs Detachment)
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